i felt bloody rudy stupid today. f*ck. Never in my life did i feel so small/undereducated/naive/immatured/lacking in thinking/inferior in front of ppl ard my age. yes. i'm intimidated after realising that my scope of knowledge and experiences are so damn extremely limited.

my gosh they are merely 1 or 2 yrs older than me and they can engage in my dad's ABSTRACT discussions-- abt philosophies, phy, math, life sciences, politics, ideologies, visions in life blah. By discussion i, by no means, suggest that they are having frivilous shallow facade chit chatting session like the way WE,ok i shall not generalize but at least for me, have been talking for my past how many yrs. To think tt i used to be proud of myself: of my thinking, my tots... How shallow. Superfical.Narrow-minded of me. I 've never in my whole life seen my dad engaging in such a discussion before( a prof Vs undergrads discussion). He, on NO account, has told me all those stuff. Well, cant hold him responsible. I'm seriously not up to the standard. What's the problem man! i mean, we are ALL undergrads! why such distinct a difference?! bloody hell, i felt like a silly pri sch kid looking retardly at da1 shu1 shu1 and ah1 yi2 men2 talking anything but my teeny weeny pathetic scope of knowledge.

Is it just me or is it the education system? no doubt it's more of the latter. coz i see nearly none of the ppl ard me equipped with such an apt and questioning mind. sucks. and to make things worse..i'm receiving this whole package of singapore education system .
boy..it sucks.

i have no thinking of my own. such ignorance is briliant. f*ck.

ok..this post might sound a little extreme coz i'm feeling very agitated.
if i have offended any pro singapore edu system ppls. i'm sorry. you are INVITED to LEAVE this blog.

on a lighter note, which doesnt concern me anyway, my dad's Uni pal, who is now a Harvard Prof ( goodness! i din know he has SUCH uni frens!) happens to drop by singapore and is going to visit us!

me: hey dad..errr so WAT happened to you?
dad: ...coz i was too slack to bother abt my eng tt time. PLEASE remind me of tt...

end of this horrendous day.

--yuzhe the P1 kid