so i was clearing my comp todae...all my thousand-year-old files...oh wells yea...at least i've got my mp3 files sorted out :) and i realised..yuzhe's most dl grp/singer....-still- linkin park n jay man...hahaz
yarh remember my mum... telling me to go 'get my life in order' by packing my room....i mean...is the state of your room a direct parallel of the state of ur life? an apt metaphor to describe my current state of life?...n the prob is my room is NV by any means in any mess..it's just happened tt i have sooooooo many sheet/s of paper all piled up rather clumsyly on my desk( tt's the prob when dey refuse to have textbks) tt i end up in this pathetic state of doing my hw on the dining table..
but we digress u c....as i was about to delete some of my many hist essays n some managed-to-gou qie for 1 yr PW files...yes...stupid hist essays n PROJECT WORK (not piao wu..:p)...i suddenly....she bu de...as in canot bear to...i couldnt bear to delete dem....den i was wondering...wad the hell.it's hisT n PW....but yarh..den again...all my hardwork...flushed down the drain just like that...amazing...i just couldnt bring myself to do it...den my fren said aptly..."gal..must learn to let go"...yes it's true...i remember the last time i cleared my inbox of all those messages good and bad..u'noe those u want to remember cuz it's special and everything...i just deleted it all in a flurry..not a pre-meditated decision but rather one of emotional folly...but hey, must i say..i felt so good after i deleted it...felt like a tremendous weight had been lifted off my back...like i was free.....free from the clutches of my memories...
yes...that's wad it is...memories....yarh..i think..we all want to remember...we all want to have something to remind us of the better (? maybe...) times we had back then..to allow us to go back to their comfort in times of distress...and well yea..handphone messages give us de luxury....even if we dont look at our old messages...they do serve to remind us becuase...well, they're always there...they're like pictures...which reminds me...i dun have a camera of my own...partly coz i don't like taking pictures..but also i believe that pictures...are taken for memory...or rather...to help us remember of some wonderful time that we have...and silly me, at that time thot that if the memory was meant to be remembered...it would b remembered without the help of a picture..haha how idealistic of me.....y den would ppl write poems...draw pictures...film movies....or even blog?! y den am i blogging??!?...it is because i want to preserve this memory of this thought that i thought...it is because the writers want to remember their wise words...the painters want to remember their colourful imagination....oh wells...im getting damn luo suo :P
but what i was talking about is....yarh....the handphone thing...sometimes...clinging on to the beautiful past...prevents us from looking to the future...
aiyahz.....so yarh..bout those files.....why the hell am i still keeping them?...i'm afraid...that subconsciously i'm afraid that i would not be able to write better than i had before...i mean..after all..it's handed in to the teacher and graded liao..there's no use of keeping it...sure...the thing im telling myself now is that...all my hardwork disappear just like that?...or even maybe cuz it's a specially good piece that i would like to keep or wadeva...but the fact is that...oh wells...i dunno what reasons are holding me back from deleting them...haiZ..